My final moments with mom

January 22nd, 2025

I woke up thinking about my last moments with mom. I was by her side when she took her final breath. I felt like a Death Dula… a coach.

Looking back now I’m sure my mom thought it was cute and she let me have my moment of feeling like I played a role. Lol.

This all came up for me again, because yesterday a colleague invited me to come hear a death dula speak to his students about how they want to die, in order to shape the way they live. It reminded me of how I felt being a death dula - that maybe it could be my calling - a few months earlier 😂

Mom died in August. I was with her every day for the final week and in those final moments I felt light as a feather. I looked at mom, with a sight beyond the eyes… and I spoke with her without using words. “I didn’t know this is what it felt like…” I said to her (but really just my internal dialogue).

It reminds me now of the scripture in Matthew 11, where Jesus says:

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I felt light. I felt joyous. I felt completely free.

Retrospectively, I hope that maybe I was just tapping into something she could feel at her moment of transition into another realm.

Not sure if that’s the case, but if so… I know she’s having a great time. Because I felt it for a moment and it was the greatest high I have ever felt.

I haven’t shared this fully with anyone yet, because I know it’s wierd. But if you bothered to read my blog… maybe you know that I am wierd and are here for it🙏🌟🫶

Big love,

♥️Cissna